I grew up mostly in Washington State. I lived in Iowa for 5 years, spent about a month living in Florida and another month in Chicago. I lived in Hawaii for a year and I served as a missionary in the Northern Colorado region for a year and a half. I've experienced the church and how it works outside of and in Utah. I am currently living in pretty much the poster picture community of a Utah Mormon stereotype(Here's another one just for fun). We have a Mormon church at the bottom of our small neighborhood, the Stake Center (a larger Mormon church) just down the street, and we have an amazing view of one of Utah's beautiful temples just outside our window. If you walk down our street I can quickly point out to you the few houses where people that are not Mormon live. There aren't many. Where I live is just that Mormon, so although I am no expert, I feel that I am somewhat qualified to talk about this subject. Let me lay it all out for you, Mythbusters style.
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Stereotypes of a Utah Mormon:
Complains about the 'long' WALK to church or the temple being 15 minutes away
Self-righteous, Holier-than-thou
Clique
Stepford Wives, cookie-cutter women
Poofy/Teased hair
Tradition or Cultural Mormon
Wolves in Sheeps Clothing
Wolves in Sheeps Clothing
Now, I'll break it down into what I can confirm or label as busted:
Green Jello:
"At one time, Utahns consumed more Jell-O per capita than any other state in the country." (Resource HERE) Yes, this is part of Utah history and I guess the culture as well. I, however, have had very little, if any, jello dishes served at any church or social event since I have lived here. Maybe everyone had so much jello when that statistic came out that they became sick of it and stopped making the jiggly treat. So, yes it's confirmed, but dated information.
Prozac:
Yes, Utah has ranked in the top rankings of anti-depressant prescriptions given. Many studies have been done to examine this. Some Mormons outside of Utah say it is because of the extreme demands to be perfect. The researchers who have looked into this believe it is due to the high percentage of educated people that are aware of the symptoms and seek help in Utah (generally). Another possibility is that Mormons are advised to not turn to alcohol and drugs to 'self-medicate', so we turn to Doctors. (Resource HERE)
Clique
When I first moved into our little neighborhood in 'Mayberry' I struggled finding friends and feeling like I belonged anywhere. It took me close to two years before I felt like I had any friends, which was difficult since we're not surrounded by family. Now I have great friends and I really love where I live.
When I was little and my family moved to Iowa, my parents sat us kids down and talked to us about being Mormon. We all knew about other religions and had each experienced minor teasing and some persecutions for our beliefs, but we were never alone in our religion. Moving to Iowa changed us. In the town we lived in there was one other family that were members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. My parents told me that I was the luckiest one in the family because the other family had a girl my age and she would be in my class. On my first day of school I knew the name of the other girl to look for. We found each other and we were instant friends. We were best friends for the five years we lived there and remained pen-pal friends for years after. We are still in touch through Facebook and our family blogs. If we did not have this common religion thread that held us together from the beginning we may have never been friends. We didn't live next to each other. We had different interests. Our families were different. Religion was what brought us together.
Whether we like it or not, we all allow ourselves to be defined by something. It is that definition, or that niche, that brings us close to other people. It is a place where we can feel emotionally safe and accepted. Most of my life I have been defined by my religion. In other places I have lived, someone of the same religion moving in would be a big deal, within the church community. Everyone would want to know all about the new family. They would be invited over for dinners and welcomed with open arms, no matter who they were. Now, imagine moving somewhere that everyone belongs to 'your' niche and has for generations. People would be glad to have you, but you may not get a big welcome party like you may somewhere else where your niche is a minority. This is where living in Utah can be hard. To find friends you have to be defined by more than just your religion. You will find cliques everywhere because people need to find connections with other people on a smaller scale. A little while ago a woman moved into our ward (congregation). I have not introduced myself to her yet. . . yes, I'm guilty of being an 'unfriendly' Utah Mormon too sometimes. I was eaves dropping when she sat down next to another woman behind me. She complimented her on her bright colored, cute dress. Conversation began. Fashion niche was found, friends made. The end. So, what I'm trying to say is if you go somewhere 'less Mormon', all you have to do is declare your religion to find an instant family. In Utah you need to find yourself beyond your religion and then the 'family' will come. With that said, I need to clarify that there is a strong Mormon community of caring for each other and looking out for each other's needs here, it just presents itself differently than other places. If you plan on moving here, you will be loved and welcomed, but don't expect special treatment because you're Mormon.
The rest of these don't have statistics and studies to back them up. I'm sure there are people that fit these molds and are the reason the stereotypes all began. However, like all stereotypes and generalizations, where there is one person that fits the stereotype mold, there will probably be 100 people that are nothing like it.
Over Achievers
I'd like to say that this is confirmed, but it's too hard to label with no real proof. Religion aside, I can say that there is an abundance of 'do-ers' in Utah, based upon the many sports venues available to the public. The 2002 Olympics were hosted in Salt Lake City, because of the easy accessibility to many of the facilities needed for large sporting events. Geographically, this is a hot spot to winter sports and so the area itself attracts athletic/involved people. Not everyone that is athletic is an over-achiever, but as the law says, 'An object in motion stays in motion. An object at rest stays at rest.' People who are busy and active tend to get more done, and I suppose that can be labeled as over-achieving. I know that's a stereotype, but I'm sure there are studies to back me up. You'll also find that in the blogging world, Mormon women in general have become somewhat of a rock-group. Just to name a few of the over-achieving women's blogs:
And just for fun, this article went viral:
So, Utah may be full of over-achievers, but is that such a bad thing? If someone wants to spend 5 hours making an ice sculpture for a church lesson, than go for it. To each his own. If such-and-such activity is not for you, than don't compare yourself or judge others that participate in it. I am a teacher in church and I don't provide amazing handouts and decorate centerpieces for the occasion each week. Do I feel like I'm out of place because I don't go 'above and beyond'? No. I enjoyed making my boys Halloween costumes. It was an unwind for me and I enjoyed having a project. I worked on it for hours after the kids were in bed. I hope no one would judge me negatively because of how I choose to spend my time.
Complains about the 'long' WALK to church or the temple being 15 minutes away
I've spent most of my life living near Seattle. I have never been to the Space Needle. I've never bought a fish at Pikes Place Market, and I don't think I ever hiked Mount Rainier, at least that I can remember. Have you ever lived somewhere and not taken FULL advantage of everything that surrounded you? My guess is that most people would have to say yes. I know that you could argue that it's not the same, but I beg to differ. There are many people in the world who sacrifice much to travel far to enjoy the blessings that we are able to enjoy down the street here in Utah. We know that we are blessed to have so much so close to us. There may be times that someone is ungrateful, but aren't we all just doing the best we can? Maybe one persons trials are different, but that does not mean the journey is any easier for someone else? God tests some people with distance and others with 'the easiness of the way' of closeness. Let's all just be grateful for what we have and if occasionally there is a complaint than lets just recognize that we are not perfect.
Self-righteous, Holier-than-thou
I really don't know how to approach this one. I don't think that because I live in Utah I am better than anyone else, or Holier. I don't know of anyone else that does either. That doesn't mean that those people don't exist, but I haven't experienced it. I would imagine that it's a lot like people from other states that assume that they are better off because of where they live. Ever heard of Texas pride? It's real. Pride for a sports team that you wish everyone else would 'see the light' about - it's the same thing. It just happens. Sure, I love where I live and I love being surrounded by church culture. I wish I could convince all of my family to live closer. I would wish the same thing if I lived somewhere else too.
Stepford Wives, cookie-cutter women
Poofy/Teased hair
This one is neither busted or confirmed. I'll label this as plausible. When I was little we visited Utah a few times and I distinctly remember thinking that all of the women had big hair. They looked over-done to me and unnatural. I had never heard of teasing (ratting) hair until I first moved here. It was weird to me. I don't tease my hair very often, but occasionally I do give it a little tease. It usually looks better and more full when it's teased. Looking around at church I think about a third of the woman tease their hair. I've now lived in Utah for a total of 9 years. I don't notice or think Utah is full of cookie-cutter women with poofy hair. However, when we've visited Disneyland and are surrounded by throngs of people I always come home thinking people dress SO differently. I'm not talking about Mickey hats either. I see a whole lot of skin; short shorts, lots of cleavage, sleeveless shirts, body piercings, tattoos, etc. In Utah a large percentage of the people live by a code of modesty (one RESOURCE here). Because of these modesty standards the outside world may see us as looking SO different too. Our being uniformly different from the outside norm may also appear as cookie-cutter. As for the hair here is an article written by a woman who was made into a Utah meme, without her knowledge. Maybe the 'done' look that many women have in Utah is due to the increased number of over-acheivers, like I talked about earlier. I do find it a bit weird that if I go to Walmart without makeup and sweats on at 10pm, I feel very under-dressed and out of place, but oh well. Most groups with similar interests end up looking a lot a like anywhere you live.
9. Tradition or Cultural Mormon/Wolves in Sheeps Clothing
I frequently hear people talk about how 'Utah Mormons' know nothing about their religion and go to church out of habit more than testimony or belief. This is the one stereotype that I find to be the saddest to hear. Here's how I want to respond, "So, what you're saying is that every member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints outside of Utah has pure faith 100% of the time, is a scriptorian, church historian, and lives a life of 100% obedience? That's awesome! I'm curious how many of the First Presidency, Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, and all of the general leaders of the church, that we fully sustain, were born and raised in Utah?. . . or, are they the exception? Just wondering." If Utah Mormons are supposedly the most judgmental, self-righteous people, than I wonder why it is that I have NEVER heard anyone from Utah make fun of a member of the church for living outside of the beehive state? Just my thoughts, but HERE are some thoughts that I find to be a lot more powerful.This one is neither busted or confirmed. I'll label this as plausible. When I was little we visited Utah a few times and I distinctly remember thinking that all of the women had big hair. They looked over-done to me and unnatural. I had never heard of teasing (ratting) hair until I first moved here. It was weird to me. I don't tease my hair very often, but occasionally I do give it a little tease. It usually looks better and more full when it's teased. Looking around at church I think about a third of the woman tease their hair. I've now lived in Utah for a total of 9 years. I don't notice or think Utah is full of cookie-cutter women with poofy hair. However, when we've visited Disneyland and are surrounded by throngs of people I always come home thinking people dress SO differently. I'm not talking about Mickey hats either. I see a whole lot of skin; short shorts, lots of cleavage, sleeveless shirts, body piercings, tattoos, etc. In Utah a large percentage of the people live by a code of modesty (one RESOURCE here). Because of these modesty standards the outside world may see us as looking SO different too. Our being uniformly different from the outside norm may also appear as cookie-cutter. As for the hair here is an article written by a woman who was made into a Utah meme, without her knowledge. Maybe the 'done' look that many women have in Utah is due to the increased number of over-acheivers, like I talked about earlier. I do find it a bit weird that if I go to Walmart without makeup and sweats on at 10pm, I feel very under-dressed and out of place, but oh well. Most groups with similar interests end up looking a lot a like anywhere you live.
9. Tradition or Cultural Mormon/Wolves in Sheeps Clothing
Facts:
Unemployment Ranking (#5 of 50 -1 being the best)
Forbes Best States for Business (#3 in 2013)
Best Performing States Economy in the Nation (#6 in 2010)
States with Best Economic Future (Strongest Economic Outlook in 2014)
I'm NOT MORMON!!! :
The views of a Utah'n that is not a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, or 'Mormon' as most people call us.
I recently chatted with a family from the East that is moving here for work opportunity. They are not members of my religion and asked about what to expect. They told me they didn't really know much about 'The Mormons' and were pretty nervous about moving to Utah because of the religion. I told them a little bit about what we believe and why. I told them about how family oriented the area is because of our beliefs, and also that we firmly believe in everyone's freedom to choose, so they would not be ostracized for being a different faith. However, I did warn them that because religion is such a big part of many people's lives here, it has become a social and cultural way of life as well. I told them that they would most likely be invited to activities at the church, Relief Society socials, and their children may be invited to come to some activities with the Primary. I let them know that they didn't need to feel obligated to go, but they were always welcome. When there is a church activity there will be a shortage of people around not at church, and we wouldn't want anyone to feel left out. The door to the church is always open and welcoming to anyone who would like to come, even if they don't believe the same as we do. A lot of people here are so used to being surrounded by people who go to church with them that they forget to explain themselves when discussing church activities and Mormon culture. Don't be embarrassed if you have no idea what someone is talking about, just ask them to explain. (I had a client once that was transferred here from California to be a minister at a local church in Provo. She didn't know much about Mormon culture and loved learning about it all. After explaining to her about my missionary service and what the days were like she frequently used 'Mormon lingo' at our appointments. When she came to get her hair done she would tell me it was her P-Day - short for Preparation Day, when missionaries prepare for their service week ahead of them by doing laundry, running errands, writing letters, etc.) It was a great little discussion I had with them and they seemed more at ease about their move. I also let them know a few basics that out-of-staters won't know: Utah Valley has a MUCH higher percentage of members of the Mormon faith than anywhere else in the State. I could be wrong but I'm pretty sure that you will find the most densely populated Mormons within Utah County to be in the Alpine area and in Provo. THIS is a great article about the demographics. To some it may not matter and I think Utah County is a great place to live, but if you want to be in an area that is more religiously diverse you may want to look outside of Utah County.
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